It's been another 365 days. I figure that is enough of a break from what was a daily part of my life for quite some time. I've kind of missed writing and I think i'll be back at it again just for my own fun.
Well, today is the 2 year anniversary of my girl moving from here to heaven. It's been an overall stupid day. I went in to work late because I couldn't pull myself together this morning and then was pretty much unproductive for most of the day. But, it helped to be there. Hunter Vision is almost as much my home as my home is. It's a place I've helped create and I'm comfortable there. There's a team of people all working toward a common goal to help others and there is a rhythm to the day that forces me to think about other things outside of the place my mind wants to go when left to it's own silence. I say today was stupid only because there is not a good word for it.
I spent much of the day thinking about the gift of Ava in our lives, what it'd be like if she were here, what she would be in to, the chaos she would bring that would be so welcomed and the joys I've missed because she isn't with us physically. So, it was a fairly selfish and sad day for me. The only thing I can come up with to describe it is "stupid".
I really don't like getting stuck in sad anymore and most days I don't live there. We laugh a lot and goof around a lot as a family. I work a lot and love the people I work with. Most memories of stuff with Ava make me laugh and not cry. But, a day like today sends all of the normal out the window. This date just matters. I still don't want it to, but I sure still do. It's just as confusing to me as it was for you to read that sentence. The truth is I just flat out miss her. It's been 2 years and it feels like 5 minutes and a hundred years at the same time.
In other, but related news:
Lisa and Noah are doing well. Noah is killing it in school and Lis is still rocking along as she keeps Noah on task and helps me with whatever comes along.
I realized it was time to update my blog when I got a bunch of people trying to send me notes in round about ways since I got off of Facebook. I just got tired of seeing what the guy I went to middle school with ate for dinner last night...so, I got outta there. Life is much simpler without it and I am digging it.
There is no great wisdom to this post. It's simply an update to let you know how we are doing two years later and a mark in history that I can come back to read in two more years.
Things are generally good. We've still got race left to run, so as long as that is the case I will do my best to honor Christ in my home and my work and in the process honor my lil girl and make her proud.
I think she'd be pleased...but, gosh do we miss her.
